Dating again

Ugh!

That has been the near universal reaction when I mention that I might start dating again.  I share that opinion of the modern dating game.

Through this process, I've made a determined effort to keep my focus on the future.  Sarah and I had 18 wonderful years together, and nothing will ever diminish that.  I'm a loner by nature, and I could be happy on my own, but I would also like to share this life with someone.  If circumstances were reversed I wouldn't want her to remain alone, and I don't think she would either.

The first thing I had to figure out is that Sarah isn't an "ex".  Her memory will always be with us, and honoring those memories is critical for the development of our kids.  Her picture will always be in my home, I'm not going to purge mementos out of my home, and I will always look back on our years together with happiness.

Dating again means that I have to think about what kind of woman I would want to bring into my life.  Unfortunately I'm afraid that I will be hunting for a unicorn.  Someone who doesn't have any kids, is willing to take on mine, and doesn't want to have any of her own.  She would also need not be much taller than me, reasonably attractive, and oh by the way actually be attracted to me.  So I'm not asking for much.  😉

I was never the guy who dated a lot of girls, in fact I think I only dated three or four girls before I met Sarah.  I was older than 20 before I actually kissed a girl and when Sarah and I started hanging out, she was the one who kissed me.  Self confidence was not my strong area.  So, with all that experience, I'm somehow supposed to navigate the modern dating scene all over again.

Sarah was the only woman that has ever looked at me with true romantic love in her eyes, and I wouldn't be surprised if that fact will remain unchanged.  I'll never know what I ever did to make her fall in love with me, but I'm really glad she did.